Sunday, August 29, 2010

Letting Go of the Pieces of Broken

I have pieces still in my hands. Pieces of broken. I think I am still in control. That I can fashion them back together and make them what they were supposed to be. I have resisted leaving them all at His feet. Oh I have set them down, begun to walk away in utter trust. But then I tip toe back as if He doesn't see and I pick up the pieces. The ones I am not ready to part with yet. Pieces that fit perfectly into my heart. If I hang onto them, it is like she is still here.

The broken places are sometimes easier to navigate...as if I know who and how to be. But hanging onto the broken is cutting too deep; diverting the healing that has begun. I must relinquish the pieces and replace them with His guiding hand. The hand that says "I am here, always by your side." I remember, He has put back together my broken before. Can I not imagine {even expect} that He will indeed piece this together {even for good}? He is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8).

So I live ever close to Him, even when it is hard to feel. Trusting, day by day despite the disorderly heap of feelings that sweep over me and the dark that sedulously tries leading me to anger and doubt. That in those broken moments I may have a breath taking, thirst quenching moment with Him. That which reminds me to keep trusting, keep running the race and to not grow weary.

4 comments:

  1. This was beautiful. You are moving forward a little more each day as He wants you to.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I am having a hard time leaving my troubles at His feet as well. I have big control issues! I have some days where I feel as if I have let go of the huge weight and I know He is beside me carrying it for me. But I have other days where I know I have grabbed it from his hands and am stubbornly trying to carry it myself. I just imagine Him giving me that look I give my daughter when I know she needs help but is too proud to ask!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Does letting God take it necessarily mean letting go? The cuts from picking up the broken pieces will become scars, and are good reminders of how he carried you in this time.

    Give the pieces to Him, and he will make it whole again - just so you can have it back fully whole, and it will always be part of your story and how you came through this time and into the next.

    You write so well, and become so tenderly transparent. Bless you in this continuing journey.

    ReplyDelete
  4. He wants it, He requires it. It's all about the surrender.

    He will catch you. He really will. <3

    ReplyDelete